Happy St. Patrick's Day

As an Irish-American, I will be making all of the recipes that remind me of my being a child and hanging out in a relative's kitchen (except my grandmothers - she could not cook).  Today is the one day per year that I cook red meat.  This year, I have a brisket portion from a local Angus beef producer that has been brining into corned beef, which will be bathed in Guinness and slow cooked for 6 hours today.  It will be amazing.

The one downside is that today is the day that people get to mock us?  I think?  I'm not sure what's going on, but it is the day that people drink nasty green beer, get drunk, and pretend that they are celebrating Irish heritage.  Currently I'm looking at someone who is plum drunk at 9am, wearing green, and pretending to be a Leprechaun.  I can guarantee that leprechauns do not sound like that. 

Instead of acting like idiots in the streets, I would suggest that we as a people, celebrate St. Patrick's Day in a way that would have made our Irish ancestors proud.  Namely, by punching Englishmen.  Hear me out... during the famine, it was the stereotype of Irishmen being lazy drunkards prevented Parliament from interceding and providing charitable food aid to starving people.  Millions of Irish emigrated in the face of certain death.  My own great-great-grandfather left a parish in Western Ireland that lost 90% of its population between 1845 and 1860.  If people want to spend this day reinforcing stereotypes, let's do this right.  We're also supposed to be hot-headed, interested in politics, and prone to fist fighting.  So, find yourself an Englishman, let him know that you're Irish, and punch them.  Especially if he's in a bar wearing green and talking about the little people.